To Dance with the Shadow

Embracing the darkness

There’s a part of us we rarely invite into our business or life.

The part that doubts, fears, sabotages, hides. The part that whispers ‘you’re not enough’ or ‘you’re too much.’ But here is what I have learned, introducing the shadow.

The shadow isn’t a mistake. It’s not something to push away, fix, or exile.

It’s an unintegrated power source, waiting patiently, lovingly, fiercely… to be danced with, and in the darkness, we don’t battle the shadow; we have to learn to waltz with it. We learn its steps. We soften into its rhythm.

Because here’s the secret: every shadow holds a gift. And in business, the woman who learns to dance with her shadow doesn’t just build a brand…

she builds an embodied legacy.

Shadows- we all have them!

Every person on the planet holds an element of shadow, it’s impossible not too- even the most spiritual, enlightened leaders. Light cannot exist without dark. But oh how often we avoid it.

We tiptoe around it.

We bury it under achievements, perfection, performance.

Most of the time, we don’t even know we’re avoiding it.

But it’s there.

In the moments we shrink.

In the moments we lash out.

In the moments we hold ourselves back from the thing we really want.

It whispers through judgment.

It shouts loudest when we’re standing on the edge of expansion.

It keeps us shackled to old, familiar places that feel safe… but slowly suffocating our souls.

Embracing the shadow can be daunting, it reflects parts of self that we may have convinced ourselves, we do not like. It requires radical truth and deep honesty.

Truth and Honesty are my kind of conversations, I don’t enjoy surface level bullshit- share your soul with me! I’m a great believer in authenticity, you get to see all of me! I’m not perfect, I’m not polished, I swear and I never try to portray myself as something I am not! I feel at peace with who I am, shadows and all!

And still, every single day… I’m learning.

I’m softening.

I’m becoming.

Authenticity seems to be becoming more rare, as we’re living in a time of highlight reels.

I see it all the time on socials, AI is spitting out perfect private jets, luxury living, immaculate aesthetics, all at the push of a button. No wonder we’ve lost touch with the sacredness of shadow.

We’re told,

“Make it look professional.” or “Keep it polished.”

But here’s the paradox:

It’s in the avoidance (pay attention to that word) of the shadow… that the sabotage seeps in. Not wanting to be seen, undercharging, people pleasing, invisibility, feeling “not good enough” because that shadow plays out all of the stories you have accumulated throughout the years.

You can’t ignore it, It doesn’t disappear when ignored. It just finds quieter, sneakier ways to write the script of our lives.

Avoidance. AVOID- DANCE!

Remember I said remember this word! Richard Rudd from gene keys shared these words of wisdom, “The word avoidance is such a funny word, as it is exactly what we do. we literally dance around that which we avoid.”

We circle it in fear.

We tiptoe in trepidation.

We make it more powerful by our refusal to meet it.

So I ask you, gently… tenderly… lovingly:

What parts of you are you dancing around?

The Shadow

The shadow reflects what we’ve disowned or judged in ourselves! It’s the part that we have made “wrong” or dislike. It’s the fears you locked away, It’s in the unhealed trauma, The grief still sitting in your bones.

My invitation to you, is to invite your shadow to dance, with you.

Ask it to…

“Show me the behaviours, the patterns, the beliefs keeping me stuck.”

“Show me the unmet needs I keep reaching for in all the wrong places.”

“Show me the pain I’ve mistaken for identity.”

Because here’s the truth:

When you embrace the shadow…

When you embrace the shadow, you reclaim the energy spent avoiding it. You integrate it back into your wholeness- a misunderstood protector, finally seen.

Embracing the Shadow

So how do we embrace the shadow? With courage, Yes- but so much more than that! We embrace….

With compassion.

With tenderness.

With curiosity.

Sit beside it, not to fix… but to witness.

Listen to its stories.

Hold its fears.

Hear its trembling voice.

Ask softly, gently:

“Is this really true?”

Use these tools, that honour both body and soul:

• Journaling.

• Mirror work.

• Somatic movement.

• Self-love hugs

• Loving touch.

• Gentle inquiry.

The antidote to fear… is always love. Hold yourself in love. Wrap yourself in kindness and gentle compassion.

Coax the shadow closer… into the warmth of your light.

Because the more you meet all of you… the more emotional safety you create.

And people will feel that safety.

Because the energy of someone unapologetic, someone integrated, someone real… is magnetic.

And so I leave you with these invitations:

• Where is my shadow dancing behind the scenes of my business… and my life?

• What fear or doubt is asking to be witnessed, not fixed?

• What new possibility opens if I love this part of me, too?

Take your time with this, there is no rush, ground yourself, breathe and remember:

You are pure potential.

As long as you hold breath… you hold the power to choose, to shift, to align.

If I could gift you one truth today, it would be this.

When you dance with your shadow, you stop tripping over it in the dark. You become the leader who moves from wholeness, not perfection. And in that wholeness, your business and life becomes not just aligned… a healing frequency the world didn’t know it was waiting for.

Love n x

If you would like to learn how to dance with your shadow, drop me a message! You will be the first to know about all the new things I am creating around dancing with the shadows!